Life After The Dress {Episode 17} Elicia Shepard

It's been quite a while since my last Life After the Dress story (click here to read about the other ladies I've had here on the blog). In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of their wedding day is over.  Today I've got Elicia, a fellow English Teacher & blogger here in South Korea.

So grab yourself a cup of tea and be ready to be inspired!

x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where you live, what do you do & how long you been married for?)

Hi! I am Elicia and my husband is Tom. Together we are the Shepards. I am 25. Tom is the ripe old age of 28!! We were married 2 and a 1/2 years ago in the Dominican Republic on a destination wedding and now we are currently both teaching English in Korea! We’ve been here for about 2 years and in just about 2 months we will pack up our stuff and say goodbye to Korea!!! After some traveling and some time at home in the USA we will be headed to Morocco to teach at an international school there. I married this guy who has given me quite the life full of adventure and Jesus.

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

ANA from Frozen!!! I love the sisterly bond her and Elsa have (I have 3 sisters!) & because my students are constantly calling me “ANA TEACHER!” when I wear my hair in a braid.

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

We met through a mutual friend. My friend was dating his childhood bestie and we met going to church actually. The boys picked me up for church and this ridiculously polite tall handsome guy got out of the backseat to let me have the front seat. I remember thinking “wow what a guy!” and trying not to stare as we drove to church. At church we sat next to each other and whispered back and forth during the service (oops!) but we were sharing our favorite bible verses. After church we made a massive breakfast and that sort of became our tradition each Sunday. We hung out pretty much constantly from that point on. He was hilarious and there was just something about us that made it extremely special It’s no coincidence I remember almost every detail from that first day. HAHA!

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

YES!!!! We began to plan our wedding after being engaged and it became very very very expensive very quickly. How were we going to narrow down the list? We initially wanted an old barn style wedding with an outdoor reception in the states. We both love the outdoors and I love vintage deco so we began to plan for that. I became stressed trying to call all the vendors and when we started adding up the costs it just didn’t “feel” right. Tom asked me one day- “Elicia, what do you really want? WHAT is your dream?” I responded quickly with “to be on a beach in a tropical place.” It was as simple as that. Next thing I knew we were looking at tropical destinations and settled upon the Dominican. We had about 25 close family and friends attend and our pastor from church flew out to marry us. It was so intimate and so special for us. The beach/resort was fantastic and I loved that we just took the plunge and did it! That was just the beginning of our life of adventure together. I wished our grandparents could have been there, but it was what we had dreamed of and the low key environment was totally just- us! My advice for brides to be…. Listen to your gut! When hiring vendors or choosing a location whether local or abroad make sure you listen to that little voice inside you- are you “clicking” with them?  Do you trust them? Will they work with you to provide you with what you want/need!?

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

Yes. And no! I’ll start with no. The beginning was sort of an adjustment period. We didn’t live together before we were married and so it took quite some time to figure out how to converge our two lives into one. We had to learn how to share our space, chores, and life with each other. Which wasn’t always the easiest in the beginning. You learn what each of your strengths are as you go and I think marriage only gets better and better. As time passes I know Tom better than I did the day before! We are always working together as Tom says “in lock step” so that we are walking through this thing we call life together- hand in hand. Each decision is no longer MY decision but OUR decision. So in a sense, yes, life after the dress has been what I imagined. I always envisioned us as a team working together- moving forward together!

Q6: What do you think makes marriage work?

For us- I can think of three things God, compromise, and LOVE or RESPECT. Depending on which one of us you ask ;)

Also, I think just having fun together. We make time to hang out together and just enjoy each other’s company. I want to be with him because I love hanging out with him and vice versa (I hope!) HAHA!

Q7: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I’ve learned a lot. Marriage has been challenging at times and rewarding at others. I’ve realized that I’m not really that good at saying I am sorry first. I’ve also learned that I am the more laid back one when it comes to the house. Tom really likes things a specific way and done in a timely manner (love you hunny!) and so even though I think in real life he is much more laid back than me- when it comes to the household those roles are reversed!

On a more serious note, I’ve learned that love/marriage is a choice that I must make each day. I must wake up and choose love. To walk in the light and respect my husband. Some days are harder than others, but I’ve made it my mission to not allow any other choice but to respect and love him.

Q8: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

Exciting. Evolving. Adventurous.

Q9: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

My grandmother always told me “love all” and I think that (perhaps most importantly) applies to marriage. Also I would add : Be kind to each other & don’t let the little things that bother you turn into big things that bother you and get in the way of why you married each other.  

You can find Elicia at the following places:

• Blog: Life's A Journey
• Instagram: @lifesajournee_liveit
• Facebook: Life's A Journee

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

Life After The Dress {Episode 16} Megan Wait

In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of their wedding day is over. If you'd like to read more about the series and meet the other ladies I have interviewed, click here.

Today's interview is with Megan, who blogs over at The Sun House:

Megan is a newlywed like me and has a lovely blog where she writes about her and her husbands adventures with their pups. So grab a cup of tea or coffee and get ready to be inspired.

x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

Hi there, my name is Megan, and besides being an editor by day, I am also a blogger at The Sun House. I live in a house on Sun street, with my husband of just over a year (12 October for the win). His name is Flip. Our garden needs a bit of tending. We also have three dogs.

Flip is three years my senior, an old man of 29 ;) He owns his own logistics company. 

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

Oh, uhm, I think the girl from Tangled might be my best bet. She is feisty, cooky, has an insatiable desire for adventure, even though she gets more than she has bargained for, but in the end, she is still a girl, and vulnerable at that. I like that she isn’t your typical, helpless Princess. She’s free-spirited and independent. Or Merida from Brave. Oh wait, I just saw that it doesn’t have to be a princess. I’m definitely Gus Gus from Cinderella. Haha. I love food. And used to love fine wine. 

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

We met through mutual friends at a braai. He fancied the crap out of me and I was entirely oblivious, because I fancied someone else. But then one day, he sent me a Facebook message: “I think you are hot and awesome, this is all for now.”I didn’t even reply. I was a bit flabbergasted.Three weeks later, I got another message: “Would you go on a date with me?” We saw each other a couple of times in between and this didn’t come up once. It was really so funny. He suggested a movie, I said no. Then he suggested dinner and he took me to a sushi restaurant. I never had sushi prior to this – now I’m hooked. 

I officially fell for him when one evening I told he could not come over because I was colouring my hair and when I got to my room, the whole bed was spread in white and red roses. My roommate sneaked it in. He officially fell for me when I stuck a fork in his leg. 

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

Our wedding was the most humbling event of my life. As soon as I put on my dress, I became a nervous wreck. I was in pieces, but I refused to take any calming stuff, because I wanted to live and feel every part of our day. I loved every minute of it. Our wedding was also very intimate, with only 60 guests. This, to me, made it all the more personal.

If I could change anything, it would probably be the fact that I walked down the aisle very fast, which I didn’t even realise. I was also so nervous that I couldn’t keep looking at Flip as I was walking down. I would want that moment over.

My advice to brides-to-be would be that if your mother wants to be part of your wedding day, let her. It’s just as an important day to her as it is to you. My mother practically took over all the décor planning and I couldn’t be happier about it. It relieved me of so much stress to know that she was there and that she helped me in every way she could.

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be? 

Yes, it is. There were some serious changes in the dynamics of our relationship. But one thing I can say is that everyone’s telling the truth when they say that being married is the best thing ever. 

Q6: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

Surprisingly, I learnt that I am an uncompromising brat. Under Construction

Q7: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

Wow, this is really difficult. I would describe it as ‘perfectly us’.

Q8: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

The best thing in life is to love and be loved in return. But sometimes it will be hard work and other times it will be smooth sailing. If you have a fight, listen first, understand, respect your spouse’s feelings and talk it out.This might sound like a newlywed speaking here, but find something about your spouse that will make you fall in love with them every day.

You can find Meg at the following places:

• Blog: TheSunHouse
• Instagram: @waitingformeg
• Twitter: @waitingformeg
• Facebook: TheSunHouse
• Pinterest: waitingformeg

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

Life After The Dress {Episode 15} Hannah Keppler

In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of their wedding day is over. If you'd like to read more about the series and meet the other ladies I have interviewed, click here.

Today's interview is with Hannah, owner of The Ruby Orchard in Howick:

I used to stop by The Ruby Orchard whenever I was in Howick and longed for the day that I had a home to fill with all of the delightful goodies in store. It's been so wonderful getting to know Hannah (although it has all been over email) and I look forward to meeting her for 'real' soon.

Go grab yourself a cup of tea and get ready to be inspired.

x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

Hello! I am Hannah a 33 year old British Mum on a South African adventure! I am married to Greg a 38 year old South African and we live in Howick, KZN. We have been married for almost 6 years... and then we were 3! Our 3 year old Jonah arrived 3 years into our marriage – possibly the cutest boy on the planet!

We lived in the sleepy Devonshire Countryside in UK, and were both career monkeys who barely saw each other. Since moving to SA in 2012, Greg has joined the family business and I have opened The Ruby Orchard a décor furniture and gift shop in the Midlands. From Director of Sport to buying pretty things and designing furniture – Such a change, but so worth it. Greg and I now see each at least 4 times a day and I blog about our shop, decor ideas and products at TheRubyOrchard.

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

Sally from cars. She grew tired of her high powered job and made a new start in a small town. She is straight forward, hardworking, and witty! 

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

Cringe... The Walkabout bar in Exeter, Devon. Jugs of snake bite, dancing, kebabs... the usual shenanigans of a 22 year old singleton. 

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

Our wedding was 100% everything I had hoped for and more. So many wonderful friend and family have said since that it was the most relaxed wedding they had ever been to. No strict timings for the day (apart from the ceremony) made it flow effortlessly. 

What I would change...? Maybe the music. In hindsight I wish we had had a live band rather than a DJ. Mainly because my mother in law kept hijacking the decks with Celine Dion... ah man...! 

My advice for brides-to-be: You don’t have to spend a fortune, have a fancy venue and hundreds of guests to have a beautiful wedding. We got married on my parents farm, arranged the flowers on the tables ourselves, I did my own makeup, friends played the music in the church, we hired the students I was teaching to run the bar and waitress and we borrowed our wedding cars from friends and famous Cricketers! 

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

I have loved every minute of building our lives together. Our 6 years of marriage have been pretty hectic (careers, finding forever home, a baby boy, packing up our lives, goodbye forever home, immigrating, starting a business, drawing plans for forever SA home). Doing these things with a husband who supports and cares, is honest and gentlemanly has made life after marriage exactly what I hoped it would be. 

Q6: What do you think makes marriage work?

Acceptance, appreciation and lots of giggling. Accept each other for whom and what you are, you should not have to change to make a marriage work. Appreciate each other every single day and always giggle... especially at the little things that only the two of you understand! 

Q7: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I have leant I don’t need hobbies or sport or things anymore... A Sunday with Greg and Jonah washing the car, mowing the lawn, doing washing and baking in our little cocoon family world is pure bliss. 

Q8: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

 Trusting – Devoted - Understood 

Q9: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you've learnt the hard way?

Never go to bed with an issue that hasn't been resolved, if you are cross, upset or unsure... it needs to be ironed out over a cuppa and chocolate before bedtime! 

• Blog
• Website
• Facebook
• Instagram
• Pinterest
• Email: therubyorchard@hotmail.com

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

Life After the Dress {Episode 14} Christine Bernard

In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of their wedding day is over. If you'd like to read more about the series and meet the other ladies I have interviewed, click here.

I 'met' Christine through her awesome monthly magazine, Flat White. I submitted a travel post on my a road trip from the Eastern to the Western Cape of South Africa (you can see it here) and we have been in touch via social media ever since. Christine is such a happy bunny, full of energy and enthusiasm and I loved reading her answers to the questions below.

So grab yourself a flat white and get ready to be inspired.

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

Hello. I’m Christine, 32 and my husband is Warren, 34. I run a Graphic Design business called Flat White Concepts and host a monthly online lifestyle magazine, Flat White Magazine and a blog; The Flat White Blog. Warren is a photographic retoucher and photographer at Flat White Images. We live in the beautiful Rondebosch in Cape Town and we have been married for just over 8 years!

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

Lilo from Lilo & Stitch. I look a bit like her, my mom is Mauritian so I feel like I have a bit of ‘islander’ in me. She is a very spirited character and I’m very attracted to her sense of ‘weirdness’. Feeling like she doesn’t always quite fit in but embracing who she is no matter what. Her affectionate feeling towards Stitch reminds me of my own love of animals!

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

We through friends at a club in Durban. The first thing I said to him is ‘I like your shirt’. We didn’t go out straight away but stayed friends for a while, however my mom told me one day that she knew who I was going to marry and that she would write the name down in an envelope and open it when I got married. The name was ‘Warren’. She said it was obvious we would eventually fall in love because I couldn’t stop talking about him.

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

My wedding was amazing. At the time we were living in London so we came back to get married at Lythwood Lodge in the Natal Midlands. Our colours were white and forest green and I wanted everything to look as natural as possible. Apparently a cow walked past the chapel when we were getting married, heh heh. I only got into the design world a few years after marriage so if I could go back I would probably add a lot more creative touches to the wedding. Other than that I wouldn’t change a thing. My advice for brides-to-be is to not take the day too seriously, to be as relaxed as possible and enjoy every second because after months of planning the actual day goes by in a flash.

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

I don’t think I had any expectations which I think is quite important. For me, I was just marrying my best friend and it seemed like the most natural thing in the world.

Q6: What do you think makes marriage work?

Communication and a hell of a lot of laughter. Warren taught me not only how to laugh at the world but also at myself. Having the same values and the same sense humour helps a lot.

Q7: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I learnt how to take things a little less seriously and to laugh when things go wrong. I have learnt that I am the type of person that needs to talk things out and that a big hug, a cup of coffee and a packet of chocolate raisins always cheers me up.

Q8: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

Laughter, Trusting, Adventurous

Q9: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

Laugh as often as you can. Be yourself (the good, bad, ugly and just plain weird). Don’t take life too seriously. Go out and have fun. Stay in and have cuddles.

• Blog: TheFlatWhiteBlog
• Website: FlatWhiteConcepts
• Twitter: @FW_Concepts
• Facebook: FlatWhiteConcepts
• Warrens Website: FlatWhiteImages

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

Life After the Dress {Episode 13} Andrea Barras

In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of their wedding day is over. If you'd like to read more about the series and meet the other ladies I have interviewed, click here.

Today is the 13th feature of my Life After the Dress series, and I am thrilled to have had so many wonderful ladies sharing their stories. The response to this series has been amazing, and these are some of the posts I most look forward to sharing with you. Today's interview is with Andrea from Clever Bird Banter. Andrea is the wonder woman behind both her own blog (Clever Bird Banter), a graphic design business, and recently, the unique kids accessory store; Baby Bird Basics. This multi talented mom (to 2 little cuties), wife, blogger and small business owner sure has a lot on her plate, and with having just moved house I so appreciate her taking the time to be a part of this series.

Go grab yourself a cup a tea and get ready to be inspired.

x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

Hello! I'm Andrea (30), wife to Murray (31) and proud mom to Addison (2) and Julia (8 months). I'm also a graphic designer, blogger and craft/DIY enthusiast! Murray and I have been married for nearly 5 years and we've just (last Saturday!) moved into our dream house in Howick, in the beautiful KZN Midlands.

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

I’m definitely Ariel, The Little Mermaid - minus the voice of course - my husband would attest to that despite my efforts at singing! I would describe myself as determined, quirky, curious – I wear my heart on my sleeve and I’m certainly not afraid to break the rules. I have a romantic outlook on life and have a tendency to be a bit stubborn. Like Ariel, I love to re-purpose everyday finds into useful things (I wouldn't go as far as brushing my hair with a fork though!)

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

Murray and I met through mutual friends while we were both living in London, although I remember his name from school days and we are pretty certain we both attended some of the same events and parties! We’d been introduced on the top deck balcony of The Boathouse in Putney, overlooking the river Thames, where we spent ages talking until I decided to leave (I wasn't feeling well!) We connected on Facebook shortly after and the rest, as they say, is history ;)

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

Wow! Let me begin by telling you that a) Murray and I were married before we’d even been together for a year, and that b) we went from engaged to married within 7 weeks - just to clarify (what most people at the time were thinking): I wasn't pregnant! I knew within the first three months of dating that Murray was The One.  After a couple of months, the issue of his visa running out (we were still in the UK at this stage) started casting a huge shadow over our relationship. I was fully prepared to move back to SA with him but we were both happy in London and wanted to get British Passports. After speaking to immigration lawyers, we decided that getting hitched was the best way forward! Our families were on board and amazingly we managed to plan a beautiful full-on wedding here in SA in a very short time frame! It was a wonderful day and there are very few things I would change. Sadly, Murray’s mom passed away shortly after our wedding so, visa reasons aside, I do believe in my heart that it was meant to happen when it did so that she could be there to share the special day with us.

My advice for brides-to-be is simple: don’t forget what a wedding is truly about, it’s not about the big party and impressing everyone, it is about your marriage – remember to spend time with each other on the day! I know this sounds obvious but there are so many guests around that bride and groom are often apart while making the rounds to thank and greet everyone – steal a few moments for each other <3

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

To be honest, life has carried on much as I expected it to. We obviously party/socialize less but I think that has more to do with age, settling down and children!

Q6: What do you think makes marriage work?

Communication, communication, communication! You can be the most well-suited couple on earth but if you aren't able to communicate with each other, life will be very difficult.

Q7: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I’ve had to practice much patience and compromise – especially during our first year of marriage because we hadn't really lived together properly before that and were still learning things about each other. I like things my way and so does hubby so we can butt heads a lot, haha!

Q8: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

Ooh, I really battled with this question – it’s so hard to pick only 3 because there are so many words that I’d need to use to describe the full spectrum of amazingness that is our marriage! I know it’s probably a bit of a cop-out but I’m going to go with “living, loving, learning”

Q9: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you've learnt the hard way?

Being married doesn't automatically turn you into some different person, one half of a whole - you still get to be you and you still need to focus on living your own dreams and making your own happiness. Obviously these ambitions need to consider your spouse, and children in our case, but I think it’s important to keep following your own passions as well as creating new dreams and having new hobbies etc with your partner. Marriage also takes energy and effort – you have to put in the time to make it work and to build a rock-solid foundation.

• Blog: cleverbirdbanter.com
• Website: andreabarras.com
• Twitter: @andreaCbarras
• Facebook: CleverBirdBanter
• Instagram: cleverbirdbanter
• Pinterest: cleverbird

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

Disney's Frozen inspired Wedding shoot by Nadia Meli

Disney's recent release, Frozen, has taken over South Korea by storm. I still can't walk through the halls of my school without hearing at least 10 different voices screaming 'Let it Go'. No one really knows why this particular animation has has became so popular here in Korea, but, regardless of the why, I can't help joining in, no matter how fed up I am of hearing the same song over and over again. And there really is no denying that Frozen was a fantastic film, with subtle (and not so subtle) changes to the traditional fairytale story that make all of us ladies feel some kind of connection with Elsa.

While planning a Frozen inspired lesson for my middle school girls I came across this beautiful styled shoot by the talented Nadia Meli. Nadia lives in Germany and has such a beautiful portfolio of images ranging from romantic weddings to soft lit lifestyle photography. She was very sweet in allowing me to showcase this styled shoot here. Isn't it lovely?!

It was Nadia's work that inspired me to really dip my toes into the world of styled photoshoots (I started off with a flower crown shoot with a Korean friend, then captured a South African friend at a temple here in my town, complete with red roses and full red lips. And yesterday I finished a fun filled picnic inspired shoot on the beach...photographs to come soon).

Thank you for making such pretty pictures Nadia, I hope my travels bring me to Germany one day so I can meet up with you over a cup of coffee or attend one of your incredible workshops.

x

You can find Nadia at the following places:

Blog

Twitter

Facebook

Life After The Dress {episode 12} Maureen Kohler

Today's post in my Life After the Dress series is a little different to those you may have read so far. To read all of their other interviews, click here. Today I am going to be introducing you to one of the most precious people in my life, my Gran.

My dear sweet Gran is a very private person, and when I first asked her to be part of this series she very graciously declined, but after some serious arm pulling, she agreed to write me a little email response to my questions. I wanted to post what she wrote to me as it is so inspirational, and well, being married for 57 years is just such a wonderful accomplishment (is accomplishment even the right word to use here?).

May all of us married women have a marriage as prosperous and loving (and as long!) as theirs.

My grandparents have been happily married for 57 years. He was her best friend’s brother and they started dating at the tender age of 17, finally marrying at 26, after my Grandfather (Charles) qualified as a dentist. 

"We have four lovely children and are still happily married – now with 7 lovely grandchildren!

'After the dress' we were very much in love and I was happy to marry and spend the rest of my life with my new husband. I regarded married life as a “vocation”, bringing up the children and looking after my husband.

Life for both of us was very busy — Charles in practise and me running the home — I was fortunate in not having to go out to work but mostly it felt like “running a small hotel singlehanded” to quote a friend of mine!

But we had lots of fun. We have a lot in common and enjoyed our tennis, music, good friends, weekends away with the children, holidays at the cottage and so many things go into making a happy home life!

Of course there were ups and downs along the way but nothing we could not sort out together; having our religion in common is a big plus for us too.

'A pearl of wisdom' to quote my beautiful sweet mother “ Tis loving and giving that makes Life worth living”; this is very true". 

Thank you Granny, I love you very much xxx

Zoey and Jasper...an overdose of cuteness

I stumbled across something last weekend that made me smile. And I can't keep it to myself, I have to share it with you. If you love photographs of sweet little ones, and you love photographs of the furry variety then this series is going to rock your socks off.

Grace Chon is a delightful lady who responded to my email right away, asking if I could feature her work here on my blog. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband, little boy and two rescue dogs (Maeby and Zoey). In her spare time, Grace photographs homeless dogs looking for their forever homes and donates her photography services every year to multiple dog rescue groups in Los Angeles (see I told you she was lovely!). Grace has also been photographing her son (Jasper) and Taiwanese rescue dog (Zoey) in a series of adorable 'twin' photographs that are bound to make your day that much brighter.

The story of Zoey the rescue pup is a happy one, although it didn't start out that way. Zoey started out life in a gutter in Taiwan, after being abandoned along with her brothers and sisters. A school girl walking by scooped up all the puppies and carried them to her home where she later contacted the Taiwan Animal Rescue Team.

'A kind volunteer at the Animal Rescue Team, Joy, found foster parents for all 5 of Zoey’s siblings, but decided to foster Zoey herself because she was the runt and the sickliest. She also gave her the name she came to America with - Star. Joy fell in love with Zoey and said she might have kept her, had she not been moving to China for a new job.

She says she never knew what happened to any of the puppies, and all that she knew of Zoey was that a Korean girl in Los Angeles had adopted her. Joy says she’s been waiting for 7 years to hear more about the puppy she fell in love with. As the photos of Zoey and Jasper broke around the world, Joy saw them in China. She had a hunch that it might be the sickly little 2.5 pound dog she nursed to health in Taiwan - and she was right.

Joy has been sending Grace photos of Zoey - from the first night she was at her apartment, to the final photo they took of her with a China Airlines stewardess before she boarded her flight to Los Angeles' (Zoey and Jasper).

I hope you enjoy these photographs as much as I do, and that you make you smile.

Happy Friday everyone!

x

"About Zoey:
Zoey is a 7 year old rescue mutt from Taiwan. She loves hiking, playing fetch with her toy squirrel, eating crumbs off the floor, and Jasper.

About Jasper:
Jasper is a 10 month old Chinese-Korean mutt from Los Angeles. He loves going for walks, eating pancakes and meatballs and yogurt and oatmeal and cereal (sometimes all together), and his best furry friends Zoey and Maeby. 

Zoey and Jasper’s mom is a commercial photographer specializing in animals, lifestyle images, and celebrities with their pets. When she isn’t furiously editing photos during Jasper’s nap time, she likes to garden and watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills." (Zoey and Jasper)

Instagram: @thegracechon #zoeyandjasper

Facebook: Shine Pet Photos

Twitter: https://twitter.com/thegracechon

Web: www.gracechon.com

Jasper & Zoey on Tumblr: http://zoeyandjasper.tumblr.com/

Korean Spring Flower Crown Styled Shoot

After a recent trip to the Yangjae Flower Market in Seoul, my friend Storm and I felt inspired to do a flower crown shoot here in South Korea. Styled shoots are a wonderful way to practice and hone your skills as a photographer, while working with other creatives and producing something that may be very different from your usual style. These kind of shoots are a far less stressful way to try out new ideas, with little to no time restraints and are a really fun way to spend an afternoon. They do require quite a lot of planning and preparation (and hunting for possible vendors and suppliers depending on your theme) but if you choose to work with people who have the same vision and ideas as you, they are the perfect platform to grow your skills and learn new things about yourself and what you are capable of.

As we are in South Korea I really wanted to try and use more of a Korean backdrop, to emphasise the Oriental elements of Korea. I had grand ideas of temples and pagoda's, soft afternoon light reflecting off clear waters but the weather had other ideas. It poured with rain that day, and so we just had to make do with what we could find for backdrops right here in my small town. This was something else I learned, that beauty can be found everywhere. You just have to change your perspective. Textured walls provide amazing backgrounds, different angles help conceal ugly buildings and cars, and the most amazing things can be achieved when you have a team of people thinking outside of the box.

I want to say a huge thank you to our stylist, Storm. Storm is incredibly creative, she handmade the flower crown we used in these pictures (blog post to come on that soon!) and had to help me with an umbrella for not just me, but for Heejoung too. Watching her holding two umbrellas, touch up lipstick, scout out new photo opportunities all in the pouring rain, was hilarious. Thank you Storm, I couldn't have done any of it without you and your ideas.

And then to our model. I've known Heejoung for a year now, she lives in the same town as Farmboy and I and is just the sweetest person. When we first mentioned that we wanted to put an oversized crown full of flowers onto her head and photograph her standing in the middle of an open field she looked terrified. But after reassuring her that it would be fun, she jumped on board and waited patiently, in the rain, wearing the most impractical outfit while I fiddled and played around with settings and angles and all kinds of different poses. Thank you for being so patient with us Heejoung, I hope these photographs make you happy. You are an incredibly beautiful woman, and were so easy to photograph. You made our job easy!

 Here are a few highlights from the shoot. I'd love to know your thoughts, please do leave them below.

We also have a few more ideas in the pipeline (f you are here in Korea, we might have a giveaway coming up soon so make sure to keep your eyes open for that). 

Life After the Dress {episode 11} Cindy Alfino

Welcome to episode 11 in my Life After the Dress series. In this series I interview married woman and ask them questions about their lives after after all the fluff and sparkle of their big days have passed. You can read all the other interviews by clicking here. 

Today I've got the lovely Cindy and her gorgeous family here on the blog. Cindy has her own delightful corner of the web "3 Kids, 2 Dogs and 1 Old House" in which she chronicles her family adventures, putting finger to keys to help keep all the memories alive. Married at 20 and a mommy to three by 25, this lady knows her stuff. So grab yourself a cup of something warm and get ready to be inspired.

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?) 

Hello!  I’m Cindy (27) and I’m married to Seth (29) – we live in the most beautiful city in the world, which is Cape Town of course.  In March we celebrated our 7 year anniversary.  In case you didn’t spot that, it means that I was the tender young age of 20 when we got married – at that time my parents still had to sign in consent (the legal age has since changed to 18).  Aaah, good times.

Since then we have been blessed with 3 gorgeous kids – Kyla (4), Riya-Ray (3) and Knox (18 months), parenting together has been so much fun (despite the hair tearing out moments) that we blog about it as 3 Kids, 2 Dogs and 1 Old House.

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’? 

I don’t know why, but my first thought was Rapunzel.  Maybe it’s the long blonde hair thing that we have in common or that she likes to beat people with frying pans, who knows?

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet? 

We happened to go on a church camp together when I was 16 years old.  Our eyes met from across the room, there might even have been a nervous, shy smile shared and then it erupted from there.  I go into far too much detail in this post if you feel like taking a little trip back into time and my embarrassingly new blogging days!

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

In hindsight I think that our wedding was actually so perfectly “us” at that point of our lives.  Sometimes I wonder if I had the chance to do it differently if I would, but it would probably lose some of the casual, understated charm that I remember so fondly today.  Also, weddings now are just so beautiful but it sometimes feels like people get too lost in the décor/dress/event in the stress to have THE PERFECT wedding, that they lose sight of each other. 

I was borderline Bridezilla with my file, my almost to-the-second schedule and my strict instructions for no one to be late or wear white. But you know what?  Things didn’t go absolutely perfectly and other people wore white (I know right?!). 

My advice is to do what you feel you need to have a great day and then on the morning let go and enjoy it – come what may.  It’s hard to think of like this, but it really is only one day in the rest of your lives together – when I look back at our life, this day is obviously special but definitely not the only one that defines our relationship.

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

Yes and no.  Knowing that Seth and I are “doing life together” is such a joy to me.  Being able to parent our babies and grow old together is something that I try not to ever take for granted and I think our love has grown deeper because of it.  Knowing that we are in it together for the long haul – despite what obstacles may come is very comforting and, dare I say, essential for any partnership.

However - marriage is no joke.  Despite what people may make you believe about it, it actually takes work to survive.  Although we spent as many waking hours as we could together before we were married, nothing quite prepares you for living together which we only did after we were married.  The first year was a bit rough, with us finding our feet and adjusting to our new environment (read: Seth adjusting to just how untidy I was), but through a lot of communication and the occasional blow out, we made it through to the other side. 

I really do think the first year is the hardest by far. 

Q6: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

 That I am more selfish, untidy and stubborn than I ever thought possible.  But at the same time, I never knew I could love so much or as deeply.

Q7: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

“Tackling life together”

Q8: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

We went on a marriage course before we got married and that already helped us to set realistic expectations in marriage (I’d really recommend it).  But what actually being married has taught me is that there are 2 important things to try and remember:

Manage Expectations – Don’t have all these expectations of your husband, especially if you know that it is out of his character to live up to them.  I’ve found that it is pointless being mad at him if he didn’t even know that I wanted him to do something.  Express your expectations to him and then if he doesn’t do it, you can be angry ;)  This is especially important once you become a Mommy – whose turn is it to go and give baby a bottle or walk around trying to get them to sleep?

Talk It Out – Early on in our marriage I would get so intensely upset about something, but instead of talking about it, I kept it bottled up.  Instead of dissipating, it grew and grew, I added more things to it and eventually I was so mad at him that we had a huge an unnecessary argument about the stupidest things.  Being open about it and talking about things as and when they come up has saved my sanity.

Oh, and get a dishwasher – that managed half my expectations in one go.

Flower fairy pictures (middle two photographs) taken by Magical Moments In Time

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I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

Life After the Dress {Episode 10} Erin Kendrick

In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of the day is over. If you'd like to read more about the series and meet the other lovely ladies I have interviewed, click here.

Today I have a very interesting love story for you, from Erin who blogs over at  Traveling Techies. Erin and her hubby are also here in South Korea, but they aren't doing what 99% of us are doing here. They are doing something a lot more interesting.

So grab yourself a cup of tea  and get ready to feel inspired.

x

Image by Dorette from Dots I Am Photography

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do
you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)
Hello! My name is Erin and I blog at Traveling Techies! My husband and I are both 28 and we've been married for about 3.5 years, the last 2 years of that spent working in one of the largest shipyards in Korea. We're both engineers (a little nerdy, I'll admit it) and love to travel which is how we ended up a long way from home! We make sure to post fun stories about the places we're traveling and also what it's like working in a Korean shipyard. I hope you'll come check us out! 

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?
I'm going to go with Belle from Beauty and the Beast here - not only is she a brunette just like me (brunettes definitely have more fun!) but she was smart, witty, and able to see the beauty inside people which I think is wonderful. I'd like to think I'm a little like her...I'm usually pretty quick to make a joke to make others laugh and I always try to remember not to judge a book by its cover and get to know people for who they are inside. 

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?
Math class. I know - so romantic...just how I always dreamed it would be! It really is a true story - we met in our differential equations class sophomore year of college and became really good friends over the next 3 years. Once we graduated, we realized we missed each other more than we missed our other friends so we decided to see if dating would work out. Secretly, we both knew that if we ever started dating, that would be it - we'd get married and spend the rest of our days enjoying life together. And, that's just what happened! He moved down to Texas and we started working at the same company, about 6 months later - he asked me to be his forever and we had a beautiful wedding in New England a year later. 

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back
and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?
Absolutely - I married the man of my dreams and got to celebrate with my family and friends - it was fantastic! We made it our goal early on to: "Get married" - and, all I can say is...mission accomplished! Did everything go as planned?! Of course not...it was pouring with rain...I mean, seriously POURING rain the night before...it even woke me up with all of the thunder and lightning, but it didn't waver my spirit in the least. The next day, as soon as I started putting my dress on, the sun came out in full force. It ended up being great because the grass was extra green for our pictures which was awesome! 

We also had a cross word on our programs to entertain our guests and the way they were printed, it left off some of the boxes. My mom came to me confessing the error and how sorry she was that she didn't catch it and I just laughed and said, "Well, we stumped a church full of engineers...there's no way they can solve it then." 

So, my advice is to remember the end goal is to start your new life with your husband and let everything else be like water on a duck - just let it roll off and keep your smile bright!

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?
I would say it's been better than I imagined - we're traveling the world together and loving it. We make sure to spend quality time together and encourage each other in all that we do. While there have been some bumps in the road and things didn't work out the way we planned all the time, we have absolutely loved being married to each other and are both extremely thankful with how our story has unfolded thus far.

Q6: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?
I CAN cook! In college, they used to tease me because I couldn't really make anything other than sandwiches and Kraft macaroni and cheese. Once we got married, I really loved to make dinner for my husband. I started trying all kinds of new recipes and it's now one of my favorite hobbies! My hubby tells me I have become quite the cook and he's always happy and well fed so it's a win-win in the Kendrick household. 

Q7: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?
This came straight from my husband: "Pretty Damn Sweet"

Q8: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers
about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or
something you’ve learnt the hard way?
Keep your sense of humor - go the extra mile every day to make your hubby or wife laugh and make sure to laugh with them. We feel so much closer to each other when we laugh and often bring up funny stories later because they are inside jokes for us which makes us smile even more. They say a belly laugh is good for your health (lower blood pressure, reduces stress, etc.) and I can assure you that there is nothing better than rolling on the floor laughing with your spouse; it really makes you happy all around. Making those extra efforts to do this as often as possible will keep such a fun spirit between you that even when the stresses of life (finances, major decisions, family drama, etc.) start to get to you, you've got a way to release that for a little while and feel awesome together.  

Top and bottom left Images by Dorette from Dots I Am Photography

You can find Erin at the following places:

Blog

BlogLovin

Pinterest

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

x

Spring Blooms in Korea

Todays post is a little Instagram round up of all the pretty Spring blossoms and blooms I've seen so far here in South Korea. I'm not sure if I've ever seen such pretty flowers, or whether I am appreciating spring a lot more since having just been through such a cold winter. Spring is quite possibly my favourite month of the year, there is a buzz in the air, and the world seems full of endless possibilities for dreams to come true and for adventures to be had. Wishing you all a very happy Friday and a lovely start to your weekend, wherever in the world you may be.

P.S. Today is your last chance to enter my #Motex labeler Giveaway! Click here to enter <3

Pretty Packages in the mail

A few weeks a go I received a very lovely package in the mail from my friend and fellow South African blogger, Nadia. Everything was put together with such care, such love and all in all...such pretty-ness! These pretty little packages are taking the world by storm under the name 'snail mail' (just do a search on Pinterest or Instagram to see the amount of time people spend on creating pretty packages of stationery and letters to send to friends and pen pals across the seas). 

In essence snail mail is the term given to the physical mailing of letters, which is such a rare thing these days with people opting to instead send instant texts and emails instead of the slower (ie snail) postal service. But, nothing quite beats that feeling of receiving something special from the post man, and that is what Snail Mailing is all about. Nadia has written a wonderful post with more information on snail mailing and how to find pen-pals to exchange packages with...click here to see more.

I have received some lovely packages in the past few months...click here and here to see them. 

Do you enjoy snail mail? I'd love to hear from you in the comments below <3

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Life After the Dress {episode 9} Ché Dyer

In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of the day is over. If you'd like to read more about the series and meet the other lovely ladies I have interviewed, click here.

Today I am so happy to have Ché up on the blog sharing her stories with us about her life after the dress. 

Ché and Warren are a fun loving South African couple living in London. Ché is a ball of energy and smiles and I feel like I have known her for years (even though we have only met once in 'real life' our paths have crossed virtually and we seem to have just missed each other wherever we have gone...we both went to Rhodes University, then to South Korea to teach English and then we were both back in the Midlands area for a short time before we both got married). We also both love sharing our passions with you on the world wide web. Ché has a delightful and hilarious blog called IndieBerries, the perfect place to pop on over to forget about your worries and your strife (no idea why The Jungle Book appeared in that sentence*) but her blog is witty, and full of fun, just like her. 

So grab yourself a cup of tea, make yourselves comfortable...and enjoy! x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

I’m Ché, I’m 28 and my husband is Warren who turned 31 last week! We are originally from South Africa, but currently live in Wimbledon, London. I am a freelance illustrator and designer and run the blog indieBerries. Warren is a portfolio manager for a Hedge Fund Firm. We have been married (almost) one year!

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

Ooh, this one is a toughie! I don’t actually know!
I’d like to say Belle – if only for her epic library – and I definitely married a  handsome beast.
Or maybe that seagull from The Little Mermaid – I always feel like I’m losing my marbles.

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

We met at Rhodes University  - at a formal dinner. Really, there was nothing “formal” about it. We were all dressed like “Trailer Trash” and they served us KFC straight out the bucket.  

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

Our wedding was absolutely EVERYTHING I could ever have hoped for and more. We had the most incredible, beautiful, sunny day with our most favourite people celebrating with us. Unfortunately, we lost all our professional wedding photos in a horrific “dog-meets-hard-drive” accident

– so maybe if I could change one thing, I would have hired a different photographer! But, if hiring a different photographer meant that anything else about our day had to change, then I’d keep everything exactly as it is.
planning, preparing and the big day with the your gorgeous man! Think out the box! We had an awesome “food story” to go with our food and the guests LOVED it!

Make it your own and celebrate in a way that means everything to you. (also – double check your photographer’s back up system!) And my advice to brides is to ENJOY the planning and the preparing!

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

Warren and I have had a strange journey – when we got engaged we were not even really dating, and we had been living in two different continents for the previous 3 and a half years (it’s a long story), so just about everything “after the dress” was new and exciting – including just being in the same country!  Moving into our first house together was SO exciting! (And super weird to begin with!) 

Q6: What do you think makes marriage work?

Being mindful, of yourself and of your partner –  appreciating him/her, having their best interests at the forefront of your heart. Laughter, love and complete support – even if it means sacrificing something for yourself – so that no matter what pitfalls or speedbumps you encounter in this life – you will always know that there is one person who will undoubtedly believe in you, always stand up for you and always protect you. Become the one thing – whatever it takes - that makes them feel happy to wake up every morning and come home to every night.

Q7: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

That I have a freaken EXCELLENT taste in men.
Just kidding.

Warren has taught me to believe in myself on a level that I have never experienced before. He has taught me increasing patience and forgiveness and how to really listen, through the way he lives his own life and the way he is with me. I feel so privileged to spend so much of my time with such a true gentleman.

Q8: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would those words be?
Beautiful precious cocoon

(I asked the same question to Warren and he replied with, “Better than sex” –which, is slightly inappropriate)

Q9: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

I read somewhere recently a quote which said, “Don’t be afraid to be the one who loves the most” and I absolutely love it!

From my personal experience – I can totally say, before you move into your first house together (whatever stage of your relationship that may be) make sure you find out the exact procedures for trash and recycling – or else you will end up, up to your elbows in two weeks worth of stinking garbage juice – and there will be tears. Trust me.

You can find Ché at the following places:

Blog

Facebook

Etsy Stationery Store

Instagram

Twitter

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

x

Life After the Dress {episode 8} Fiona Rossiter

I am very excited to feature the lovely Fiona Rossiter today, the lady behind Cape Town based lifestyle blog Inspired Living. Fiona is the 8th guest I have had here on my blog in my Life After the Dress series where I interview woman of all ages and walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now that all the fuss and fluff of the big day is over. 

I am hoping that when Farmboy and I get back home to South Africa in a couple of years time I will be able to meet these ladies for a real cup of tea. I have learned to much from each of them, and I love posting each of their stories here on the blog. Thanks for being a part of this Fiona! 

x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

Hi I am Fiona and I am happily married to the love of my life, Grant! Last year was quite an emotional year, with me reaching a major milestone in my life! I turned 40!!! Something I still do not like to say out loud but am starting to accept! My hubby Grant is only 11 months older than me so we keep each other young. We live in Noordhoek, Cape Town – in my opinion the most beautiful city in the world (not biased at all)! We have been married for 17 years – it’s was our anniversary on the 7th of December. I cannot believe how time has flown, it seems like just yesterday he was down on one knee, proposing to me! We have two gorgeous girls, who make our world a better place – our lives would not be complete without them. I am a full time mom, blogger and true creative at heart, with too many ideas and not enough hours in the day. Grant is a Portfolio Manager for an investment company (in his own words he makes other people rich ;) but a true entrepreneur at heart!

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

Amazingly this was a bit of a difficult one to answer, I could not decide on my own, so I opted to do two on-line quizzes to see what the “experts” had to say! As a Disney Character I am apparently like PINOCCHIO yes Pinocchio! Even I was surprised – the synopsis:

“You like to work towards dreams you have, but you sometimes get tempted by the devil in disguise. But when it comes down to it, you're quite a happy person who just wants to be the best they can be!” I had a good giggle but in essence this is all very true. As a Disney Princess I am apparently much like Jasmine, as I dream of freedom from my lifestyle and I hate pompous jerks (ain’t that the truth)!

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

Funny story really – I was essentially his boss. I worked at a jeweler and he started working there, as a holiday job, while he was at university. I hate to sound cliché but it was love at first sight – well for me anyway! We were young but I think we both knew what we wanted out of life – or at least we thought we did. We did date for four years before we got married, which I think was important to establish our relationship.

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

My wedding was amazing, something fairy-tales are made of! Not having my own mom around when I got married was tough but I have been blessed with the most amazing mother in law! We did get married very young and were the first in the family to tie the knot, Grant is one of four boys and I have a younger brother. As you can imagine there was great anticipation from all involved, being the first to get married {no pressure at all ;)}. Would I change anything about my wedding day - yes I probably would. Our wedding was way too big but being the first in the family we did not know better. We had a very traditional wedding which we both wanted but I guess if I did have to do it over I would have a smaller more intimate affair. Please don’t get me wrong, I loved every minute of my day but know what I do now I would do it differently – I am wiser I guess. So my advice for brides-to-be, is no matter how big or small your wedding, make sure you actually enjoy it – dance, have fun because it is a once in a lifetime experience!

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

I think that life is never exactly what you expect it to be but if you had to ask me if I was happy - I would definitely have to say yes. Growing up I dreamt that I would meet my prince charming, get married, have two children and live happily ever after – see dreams do come true!

Q6: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I am an extremely stubborn person and a perfectionist, someone who does not like admitting when I am wrong {which is mostly never} but marriage has taught me that if you want to be happy, you need to make allowances for others and at times compromises. This is true for all relationships in life but especially true, if you want your marriage to work. I was extremely independent before we got married, so for me the biggest lesson has been to learn to rely and trust someone else. Oh and as my hubby will tell you I am very high maintenance!

Q7: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

LOVE, ACCEPTANCE, TRUST

Q8: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you've learnt the hard way?

I think the most important thing is to marry your “best friend”, yes it is important to marry for love but you also need to “like” the person you are marrying. If possible marry someone with the same beliefs and morals as you have, this is especially important when it comes to parenting children. Don’t get me wrong I am not saying marry a carbon copy of yourself that would be boring but discuss what you want and envisage for your life before you get married, to ensure you are actually on the same page! Oh and most of all have fun, remember to laugh – if nothing else it keeps you young!

You can find Fiona at the following places (in particular on her Youtube channel where she posts great videos about her favourite makeup and beauty products, as well as showing you how to use the products!)

Blog

Facebook

Pinterest

Instagram

Twitter

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

x

Life After the Dress {episode 7} Caley Rosenberg

Todays lovely interviewee is the sweet Caley who blogs over at Ellie Love. I feel like I've known Caley for years, thanks to the wonders of social media. We haven't officially met in person {yet} but I have loved following along in her blogging journey and seeing photos of her cute little one on Instagram. Her blog is a delightful place to wonder around and get lost in, so grab yourself a cup of tea and read all about her life after the dress.

In this series I will be interviewing ladies of all ages and asking them questions about their lives, after their big day. It is my hope that you feel inspired, and leave my blog feeling hopeful and happy, with renewed energy for your relationship, or excitement for what the future may hold for you.

Happy reading!

x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

Hi lovely CityGirl Searching readers. I am Caley and I blog over at Ellie Love. I am married to my gorgeous blonde husband, MC and we live in Durban, South Africa. Both born and bred in this beautiful coastal city, the sun, sand and sea are our home. I am a qualified primary school teacher but I am now a stay-at-home mom to our little 20 month old daughter, SJ and baby #2 on the way (due June 2014).  MC works for a Mining Facilitations Company and is involved in many mines in Africa and investments worldwide. We met in 2006, got engaged in 2009 and got married on 2nd October 2010 - a blissful and eventful 3 years of marriage.

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

I would have to say Ariel from The Little Mermaid. Ariel is a free-spirited mermaid who knows her mind and doesn't follow the crowd. She overcomes the hurdles in her life and follows her dreams to find her Prince Charming and live her fairytale. There is also something magical about a mermaid's tail and living under the sea.

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

You can read our full story here but a short version is: we met in a local night club with me staring at MC's crotch area, admiring his impressive belt buckle (cringe!)

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

Our wedding was the most magical day of our lives - everything ran smoothly from start to finish and we had a lot of fun with special family and friends. We loved all our little details and really felt that everything was a true representation of us as a couple. A dream come true.

As the times and styles change over the years, there are definitely things I would do differently if I were to re-do it all over again - especially as there was no Pinterest during my wedding planning! But I would change anything from our special day.

My advice to other brides-to-be - stay calm and enjoy every moment. There is so much to do, so much to think about and potentially a lot to worry about but it really doesn't matter. Things find a way of all coming together and as a bride, it really isn't for you to worry about on your big day. Enjoy every moment from the second you wake up and open your eyes with a tummy full of butterflies and excitement to the pure content feeling of falling asleep in your husbands arms. The day goes by so quickly and you don't want to miss a thing - especially because you were too busy worrying about something trivial. Have fun and enjoy!

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

It has been everything I had imagined, and so much more. Marriage has been the most wonderful commitment MC and I have made. It was also the start  of our lives together, in the same country (after our long distance dating) and spending every moment together has been magical. We have been blessed with a special bond and an incredible friendship that has blossomed into a strong and beautiful marriage - full of fun and special memories as well as sticking together and growing as a couple through the difficult times. "Life after the dress" has been exciting and fast paced and a great adventure, as well as the start of our sweet family.

Q6: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I have learnt that I am a changed and better woman with MC by my side. He brings out the best in me as well as calms me down and keeps me level-headed in moments of need. He has helped me grow as a person in all walks of life, realise my potential and encouraged me when I had my doubts. I have learnt to that I can defy all odds (and my upbringing) and be the wife and mother that I always dreamed I would be.

Q7: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

Loving, supportive and exciting.

Q8: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

Never say a bad word about your spouse and never put them down. You are there greatest supporter and number one fan, and your belief in them is what keeps them going each day. I cannot find a negative thing to say about my dear hubs and it's not because he doesn't have faults or traits I don't agree with but he is the man I married with everything so amazing about him, and the man I fall more in love with each day.

You can find Caley at the following places:

Blog

Pinterest

Instagram

Twitter

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

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Life After the Dress {episode 6 } Kathryn Rossiter

Today is the sixth episode in my Life After the Dress series where I interview real women, asking them real questions about their lives after their wedding day (click here to go back and read the other episodes).

Today I am very happy to introduce you to the beauty and brains behind the lovely lifestyle blog Becoming You. Kathryn and I have been in contact for a while, but in between kiddies parties, Christmas and my computer going on the brink, it's taken a little while to get her post up.

So go grab yourself a cup of tea and get ready to be inspired.

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

My name is Kathryn, I'm 33 years old and have been married to my husband Brad for 12 years in April. If you do the sums you'll discover I got married when I was only 21. A child bride as some of my friends like to tease me! We live in Cape Town and have 2 kids aged 7 and 3.

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

You'd think with the amount of Disney that gets played in our house that I would have a definite answer to this question but I'm really not quite sure who I identify with. So instead I did a quiz called "What Disney character are you" to discover that I am in fact... Mary Poppins - does she count as a Disney character? Or must it be animated? In that case I want to be a princess ;)

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

How did you meet? is one of my favourite questions to ask couples too! Probably because our story is quite unique. Not many people can say that they met on a blind date! I'm now a big advocate of taking a chance when it comes to meeting "the one" - I encourage my friends to go on blind dates, try internet dating, step out of their comfort zone. I had to and it paid off beautifully...

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

My wedding at Suikerbossie in Hout Bay was so lovely, I have very fond memories of the day. I loved the process of planning it and became quite involved as the project manager with a HUGE file of ideas but back then (sounds like it was centuries ago) the wedding industry wasn't nearly as hectic and as long as you had a venue, dress, florist and photographer you were good to go. The only things I might change looking back is to have had beading on my dress, less plus+1s I didn't know and that my honeymoon flight wasn't at 4am the next day! The day goes by in such a blur of busy-ness that my advice would be not to sweat the small stuff too much as often you don't even notice that stuff and neither do your guests. It makes you so incredibly busy in the run up to the wedding and takes the focus off what is actually happening - you're marrying the love of your life!! On the day something WILL go wrong so expect it and then just roll with it! Hand over responsibilities to as many people as you can so you can just glide through the day and enjoy it. And don't forget to stop every now and again and sit back to soak in the day. Capture little pictures in your memory of the people, fun, smells, views, everything.

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be? 

Yes and more! We didn't live together before we were married, in fact we didn't sleep together either! I know some people think that's pretty crazy or weird, but for us it was the best decision we made and we are so blessed to have only known each other. The first year can be up and down while you both are still finding your feet and needing confirmation of your partners commitment to the relationship but if you can push through those times, keep talking always and use every conflict to help you grow in your understanding of yourself and your spouse, then they will be worth it!

Q6: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I was pretty undomesticated moving overnight from my parent's home to our marital home so I had to learn a lot about cooking, cleaning and I still do! I've learnt how to communicate better and that it's important to talk even when I don't feel like it or don't have the right words to say, I need to be prepared to talk things through and that's a start.

Q7: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

An Honest, Fun, Partnership

Q8: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

I've learnt that giving each other a little bit of space and room to breathe is far healthier than living in each others pockets. In the first year of marriage I remember trying to do everything together but keeping your own interests and having something that is uniquely yours, especially once you're a mom, is so NB for your sanity (and his). Spending time with my girlfriends and maintaining those relationships is also very important to me but I'm careful not to over share with others about our private world especially if my husband is sensitive about a topic. Another top tip is to travel with your spouse as you learn a lot about them that way. You can do this before you get married or after but I would say you need to do this before you have kids so that when the going gets tougher (once the babies arrive) you have some fun memories to fall back on to pull you through. Also our pre-marriage course and counselling sessions that we attended (before we were engaged!) were invaluable and I recommend everyone does something similar through their local church or marriage counsellors as they help you to discuss the big questions you might never have thought of. 

You can find Kathryn at the following places:

Blog

Facebook

Instagram

Twitter

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together. Each lady I have been in contact with so far has taught me so much about life and marriage, and I feel so honoured to be able to share their stories with you. Thank you Kathryn, and thank you to each of the wonderful ladies I have featured here so far. You are all so inspiring <3

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

x

Why I'm getting a divorce this year

A friend sent me the following article and Farmboy has been mentioning it a lot lately. But, no sooner have I decided to make a change than I get sucked back into the digital world.

I have used a powerful title for this post because I feel very strongly about this. I am utterly guilty when it comes to what is written below, but I am finally ready to make a change.

Jarrid Wilson wrote the following article at the end of last year. Jarrid is a pastor, and although a lot of what he has to say on his blog might not be everyone's cup of tea, I think he makes some very good points below. Let me know your thoughts on this in the comments section below. I'd be interested to hear what you make of this (and all the other articles like it).

"Before you start assuming I will be leaving my wife, let me just tell you that’s just simply not the case. I’m looking to leave someone else. Someone you may not know about. Someone who takes up most of my time, distracts me from spending time with my wife, and even spends time with me during the late hours of the night.

Her name is iPhone 5. She’s extremely smart, funny, reliable, and keeps me up to date with all the latest trends. And although she’s always by my side, I can’t help but notice that she is keeping me from spending time with the people who matter most in my life: God, my wife, my family, and my dreams.

She’s really good at keeping my attention. So much so that I’ve been known to completely ignore people when they are trying to have a conversation with me. She tempts me to use her apps while at church, weddings and funerals, instead of enjoying the moment un-distracted. She even keeps me from working on personal projects that have strict dead-lines.

She’s extremely insensitive when it comes to my safety, and is always tempting me to be with her while I drive. I can’t help but notice she is slowly infecting my social life, my marriage, and the lives of those around me. Many people act like it’s no big deal, but I imagine the longer one ignores this issue, the worse one’s personal relationships will be affected in the long run.

We need to bring our phones back to being an accessory, not a priority.

2014 Challenge: Divorce your phone, your apps, your social-feeds, and engage in relationships with people that actually matter. Vow to spend a significant amount of time off your mobile-devices, unplugged, and instead get back to making personal relationships that will stand the test of time.

Other than God, my wife deserves to be the #1 priority in my life and I don’t want anything to get in the way of that. The reality is, we’re all married to our phones in one way or another.

Mind you. Not everyone struggles with this. But I hope you will take this into consideration regardless.

1. Learn to balance the time you spend on your phone.
2. Make your phone an accessory rather than a priority.
3. Give yourself limitations as to when and where your phone can be used.
4. Control how you use your phone, and stop allowing your phone to control you.
5. Try spending parts of your weekends unplugged, offline, and away from your mobile device.

In 2014, I vow to divorce my phone. Will you join me? Share this with a friend, and let’s get the “Divorce Your Phone” movement going."

-Jarrid Wilson

I am going to be weaning myself off Facebook from today, removing it from my phone and only checking in once or twice a week. Now I realise you've probably landed up here on my blog via the link I posted on Facebook, and this may seem hypocritical to you. I guess it is. However, I don't want to be one of those people who rants about Facebook and then has to tell the whole world that they have removed their profile. I just want to say here that I will be out of touch there (and on all the other platforms) for the time being, opting instead to be contactable via the 'old school' methods of phone and email (citygirlsearching@gmail.com).

One of the biggest advantages of Facebook for us has been the constant feed of photographs we have been able to share with our family and friends while living here in South Korea. I am going to continue with sharing snippets of our lives and photographs of pretty things, but I will be trying to limit it to being only here on blog. I love blogging and it takes up enough of my personal time as it is, but the combination of Facebook, blog, Twitter & Instagram is just too much of a life sucker. 

If you would like to stay in touch and check in on us, you can pop by here on the blog. I will keep the Facebook Page for the blog active, mainly to post links to blog posts. Please don't berate me if slip up and you see me liking and commenting on peoples statuses on Facebook. As with any addiction, will power is key. Addiction may sound like an exaggeration, and although Social Media may not be as harmful to my health as drugs and alcohol, it is just as harmful to my personal relationships with my friends and husband.

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Have a lovely day everyone, I'm off to attempt a new book I have been meaning to read for months. I'm sure a whole lot of free time is about to open up and I plan on enjoying every moment, rather than trying to capture it and share it with the world. Will you join me?

x

Meet Miss Milly & a {Giveaway}

Today I am really happy to introduce you all to a lovely lady, business owner and new blogger; Theresa from MissMilly.

Theresa is from South Africa (yay for local talent) and is the brains behind her creative craft business called Miss Milly. 

Miss Milly is about
birds and the beauty of vintage
craft and being happy
washi tape and wood
hearts and handmade
pastel and pretty
owls and foxes

It's all about {pink} ice cream!
And above all God.

For prices you can visit her Facebook page (click here) which has all her current stock. And to contact Theresa directly you can pop her an email on missmillysa{at}gmail{dot}com.

You can visit MissMilly at the following places:

Blog

Facebook & Store

Pinterest

CityGirlSearching & MissMilly Be Your Own Valentine Giveaway

To introduce you all to her products, MissMilly is giving away some beautiful hand crafted washi taped goodies; a pretty heart brooch, matching earrings and a matching bobby pin. All you have to do is use the fancy Punchtab giveaway thingymagiggy below. You can enter in a variety of different ways (a few of the mandatory but most of them are extra's) and each way earns you another entry {please let me know if you have any problems, I know the entry system has given people hassles in the past when using Internet Explorer. If you are having issues, try refreshing your browser, or if you are able to, try visiting my blog again using Google Chrome}.

*Giveaway ends on Friday 31st January at 11pm (South African time).

*This giveaway is only open to South African readers.

Good Luck!

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15 easy marketing ideas for bloggers + FREE checklist!

Today I want to share with you 15 easy ways for you to get your blog out there. Some of them may seem obvious, and others not so much. I have been doing these things for a while now, and I have really noticed an increase in my readership here on my little corner of the web.

Blogging should be about sharing your passions with others, it shouldn't be something you have to force yourself to do. If you don't enjoy blogging, change what you're blogging about. Post a survey to your readers and ask them what they would like to see on your blog, so you can get some more inspiration for content. I have a constant internal battle with this though.

Sometimes the number of likes I get fuels my passion for blogging, and I feel drawn to post what is currently trending. But most of the time, I know that this blog is me, it is about me and what I like. It may be a small niche (searching for the  pretty-ness in everything is not everyone's cup of tea) but if I stick to blogging about what I like and what I find interesting as opposed to what I hope other people will like, then that's real.

And that makes me happy.

15 Easy Networking Tips for Bloggers

1. Network. Network. Network. In other words, use the social media accounts you have to actively engage with your followers.

2. Reply to every comment on your blog/Facebook/Instagram feed. 

3. Comment on other blogs, often! This seems obvious, but it really does help to get your blog noticed. When I see a reader has commented a couple of times on my blog, I am more likely to search out her blog (if they are a blogger) or spend some time finding them on twitter/Instagram and sharing some love on their accounts.

4. Email bloggers whom you admire, tell them that you like their blog. Be real. Don't just write something like 'Hey. Love your blog. Here is mine...etc'. Be honest with what you like about them, then just leave a simple link to your blog at the end of your email. There is nothing nicer than getting a email from a happy reader who wants to share her love for your work.

5. Start a Facebook page and use it for your blog rather than your personal Facebook page. I could tell from the decrease in engagement I got from my posts on Facebook after the first few weeks of spamming my friends and family with my blog posts on my personal page. 

6. You don't have to be a wizz at every social media platform. Rather choose one that you can commit to as opposed to having four accounts with little to no activity. Choose a platform that you genuinely enjoy using. Social media is fun, it shouldn't be a chore, and you shouldn't dread your time spent on it (on the other side of the coin, make sure to schedule in 'breaks' from the screen to ensure a healthy balance between real life and the online world).

7. You don't have to blog every day. This is tiring and you lead to you producing mediocre content rather than interesting and engaging material. But try to post at least 2 to 3 times a week to keep your content fresh.

8. Email other bloggers and ask about doing a guest post on their blog. This gives them new content and you get a chance to reach new readers. The worst they can do is not reply. At least you've put yourself out there and most likely they will at least click through to your blog and you might gain a new reader.

9. Ask questions at the end of your blog/Facebook posts. People are more inclined to respond to a question and comment, you are inviting them to actually do something as opposed to them passively taking in your content and moving on to the next post.

10. Use Facebook for short, catchy posts like quotes and photographs. People are visual, and drawn to interesting graphics and images as opposed to long lines of text. When you do use text, break it up into easy to digest chunks (the same goes for your blog posts). With Pinterest, people are being exposed to so much great content all the time, us bloggers have to work harder to make our blogs appealing to people. Why would someone go you your blog for recipes when they can go onto Pinterest and have thousands of red velvet cake recipes at their fingertips in seconds. No matter how many hours you spent prepping that post, you need to work on being different. What can you offer your readers that Pinterest can't? You might have a great sense of humour when you write your recipes, something that they can't find on Pinterest..put those thinking caps on!

11. Carry business cards with you...everywhere. You don't have to have a massive following to be allowed to have a business card. It makes you look professional, and you can quickly whip one out to give new friends you meet (people qill quickly forget your web address, even if you think it's the easiest name to remember).

12. Find other bloggers in your area and connect with them on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram. This means following all of their accounts and not expecting them to do the same (don't announce to the world that you've followed someone in the hopes that they return the favour). Follow them because you genuinely want to read about what they are up to, then engage with them in an honest and real way and they will in all likely hood follow you back.

13. Meet up with other bloggers. Don't be scared off by the fact that they might have 893 likes on Facebook and you have 12. We all start somewhere. I have met a lot of new friends this way (and I'm sure a few of them thought I was some crazy stalker when I first got in touch with them lol). But gently does it. You should be getting to know them through their blog and twitter accounts first before ambushing them into a coffee date.

14. Take your own photographs. Always. And when you can't find the right photograph, make sure you properly credit the rightful owner or email them for permission first. Rather have a blog post delayed while you get permission for using an image than get into legal trouble like this blogger. Oh, and Pinterest, just like Google, is not a source (read this great post on sourcing images from Pinterest). 

15. Have patience. You should be blogging because you like blogging. Not because you want to become famous. Although that's nice too.

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Want a handy, printable checklist of all the tips mentioned in this post? All my blogging resources are waiting for you inside the CGScreative Resource Library which you can get free access to by clicking the image below: 

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Happy Blogging friends!

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