Life After the Dress {Episode 22} Stephanie Hedger

Hello and welcome to the next episode of my #LifeAfterTheDress series here on my blog. In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of their wedding day is over.  You can read more about the other ladies I have interviewed so far by clicking here.

Today I have blogger and traveler extraordinaire, Stephanie Hedger. Stephanie makes up half of the drool worthy, Hedgers Abroad blog along with her husband, Ryan. Having connected with her over social media, I am so looking forward to meeting her in person later this month to collaborate on a new styled photo shoot I have in the pipeline.

So grab yourself a cuppa and get ready to be inspired.

x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

Hi! My name is Stephanie and my husband’s is Ryan. We are both 28 years old and are we are from small towns in Oklahoma. Two and a half years ago we moved to South Korea to teach English and blog about our travels at Hedgers Abroad! In July we celebrated our 4 year (?!) wedding anniversary!

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

Good, well rounded Disney female characters are hard to come by. Most of them are just girls who go through some sort of hardship which is eventually solved by falling in love.

I think the character that I could identify most with would be Merida from “Brave.” When I was young, I was very headstrong and quite the tomboy. I had a hard time seeing eye-to-eye with my parents and always wanted to do things my way. I guess I am still sort of like that now haha!

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

We met in college while hosting a conference for Oklahoma State University. It was awful timing as he was planning to pack up and move to Chicago for photography school in just a few short months. We just had the summer to be together and by the end of it we decided that we were simply just meant to be. He stayed just to be with me and reenrolled at our university. We have been inseparable ever since.

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

Planning our wedding was stressful. A lot of people had a lot of opinions about how we should be doing it. We actually considered eloping halfway through the planning, but stuck it out. In the end, our day turned out to be really special and our friends and family came from all over the country just to be there. We were glad that we stuck it out and had the celebration with everyone there. If we could go back and change anything, we would just have kept everything low key and simple; get married in the fall out in our family’s backyard.

There is so much pressure to have the PERFECT wedding that couples can easily lose sight of what is most important. So figure out what’s the most important for you to have on your special day and consider nixing the rest. Don’t get so caught up in the planning that you forget to enjoy yourself!

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

Yes! We dated for three years before getting married, two of which we spent living together. We were basically already a married couple at that point without the actual paperwork. By the time we were married, we already knew everything about each other and the only thing that changed was my last name.

This trend is becoming more popular with couples and I think it really helps to test relationships. When there is a fight, you can’t just walk away and wait to see who will call to apologize first. You have to face problems head-on. You become a team and, in time, you are able to see the other person’s values and priorities.

We loved living together and even adopted a few animals in the process. We knew pretty much right away that we wanted to be together for the rest of our lives and after that, it was only a matter of time before Ryan popped the question!

Q6: What do you think makes marriage work?

My advice is to never stop dating each other. Just because you are married doesn’t mean you can just stop trying! Do new and exciting things together, be spontaneous, learn something new, go on road trips, or find a new hobby to do together. Don’t become complacent.

Q7: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

I have learned that I have the tendency to pile WAY TO MUCH onto my plate. Eventually, I stress out and in the midst of my panic and frustration, there’s Ryan to pull me out of my spiral. He goes through life with such a carefree attitude and it is something I really admire. I get so caught up in life that sometimes I completely forget to take it easy, but I am working on it.

Q8: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?

Fun, daring, happy

Q9: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

 Be silly. Make each other laugh. Life isn’t as serious as everyone makes it out to be.

You can follow our journey!
Blog: Hedgers Abroad (www.hedgersabroad.wordpress.com)

Instagram: @hedgersabroad (https://instagram.com/hedgersabroad/)

Facebook: Hedgers Abroad (https://www.facebook.com/hedgersabroad)

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I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

Life After the Dress {episode 9} Ché Dyer

In this series I interview married women of all ages and from all walks of life and ask them real questions about their lives now, after all the glitter and sparkle of the day is over. If you'd like to read more about the series and meet the other lovely ladies I have interviewed, click here.

Today I am so happy to have Ché up on the blog sharing her stories with us about her life after the dress. 

Ché and Warren are a fun loving South African couple living in London. Ché is a ball of energy and smiles and I feel like I have known her for years (even though we have only met once in 'real life' our paths have crossed virtually and we seem to have just missed each other wherever we have gone...we both went to Rhodes University, then to South Korea to teach English and then we were both back in the Midlands area for a short time before we both got married). We also both love sharing our passions with you on the world wide web. Ché has a delightful and hilarious blog called IndieBerries, the perfect place to pop on over to forget about your worries and your strife (no idea why The Jungle Book appeared in that sentence*) but her blog is witty, and full of fun, just like her. 

So grab yourself a cup of tea, make yourselves comfortable...and enjoy! x

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)

I’m Ché, I’m 28 and my husband is Warren who turned 31 last week! We are originally from South Africa, but currently live in Wimbledon, London. I am a freelance illustrator and designer and run the blog indieBerries. Warren is a portfolio manager for a Hedge Fund Firm. We have been married (almost) one year!

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?

Ooh, this one is a toughie! I don’t actually know!
I’d like to say Belle – if only for her epic library – and I definitely married a  handsome beast.
Or maybe that seagull from The Little Mermaid – I always feel like I’m losing my marbles.

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?

We met at Rhodes University  - at a formal dinner. Really, there was nothing “formal” about it. We were all dressed like “Trailer Trash” and they served us KFC straight out the bucket.  

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?

Our wedding was absolutely EVERYTHING I could ever have hoped for and more. We had the most incredible, beautiful, sunny day with our most favourite people celebrating with us. Unfortunately, we lost all our professional wedding photos in a horrific “dog-meets-hard-drive” accident

– so maybe if I could change one thing, I would have hired a different photographer! But, if hiring a different photographer meant that anything else about our day had to change, then I’d keep everything exactly as it is.
planning, preparing and the big day with the your gorgeous man! Think out the box! We had an awesome “food story” to go with our food and the guests LOVED it!

Make it your own and celebrate in a way that means everything to you. (also – double check your photographer’s back up system!) And my advice to brides is to ENJOY the planning and the preparing!

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be?

Warren and I have had a strange journey – when we got engaged we were not even really dating, and we had been living in two different continents for the previous 3 and a half years (it’s a long story), so just about everything “after the dress” was new and exciting – including just being in the same country!  Moving into our first house together was SO exciting! (And super weird to begin with!) 

Q6: What do you think makes marriage work?

Being mindful, of yourself and of your partner –  appreciating him/her, having their best interests at the forefront of your heart. Laughter, love and complete support – even if it means sacrificing something for yourself – so that no matter what pitfalls or speedbumps you encounter in this life – you will always know that there is one person who will undoubtedly believe in you, always stand up for you and always protect you. Become the one thing – whatever it takes - that makes them feel happy to wake up every morning and come home to every night.

Q7: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?

That I have a freaken EXCELLENT taste in men.
Just kidding.

Warren has taught me to believe in myself on a level that I have never experienced before. He has taught me increasing patience and forgiveness and how to really listen, through the way he lives his own life and the way he is with me. I feel so privileged to spend so much of my time with such a true gentleman.

Q8: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would those words be?
Beautiful precious cocoon

(I asked the same question to Warren and he replied with, “Better than sex” –which, is slightly inappropriate)

Q9: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you’ve learnt the hard way?

I read somewhere recently a quote which said, “Don’t be afraid to be the one who loves the most” and I absolutely love it!

From my personal experience – I can totally say, before you move into your first house together (whatever stage of your relationship that may be) make sure you find out the exact procedures for trash and recycling – or else you will end up, up to your elbows in two weeks worth of stinking garbage juice – and there will be tears. Trust me.

You can find Ché at the following places:

Blog

Facebook

Etsy Stationery Store

Instagram

Twitter

I hope you have been enjoying this series as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

If you would like to be featured here on the blog, you can drop me an email using the contact form above or leave me a comment below. I look forward to hearing from you!

x

Life After the Dress {Episode 3}...Irene Woodhams

Today I am introducing you all to the lovely Irene. Irene is my third guest here on the blog in my new blog series entitled {Life After the Dress}. In this series I am interviewing real woman and asking them questions about their lives after their wedding day. I am asking them real questions about their marriages, and of course having them give me and you some pearls of wisdom that they might like to share. If you would like to read more about this series, or if you would like to be featured here on the blog, click here or you can drop me an email here or leave me a comment below.

Q1: Please introduce yourself (age, of both yourself and your husband, where do you live, what do you do & how long have you been married for?)
My name is Irene (Lulu to family and close friends) and my husband’s name is Moresby. I am 57 and Moresby is 61. I do a little freelance work as a Kitchen Designer and sell retro/vintage items. My blog is called ‘Lulu, Yesteryear Redeemed’. Moresby is a mathematics teacher. We have been married for 34 years (next month) and have two sons. We have lived in the same house for 32 years! To some this might be boring but to us, our home is full of memories!

Q2: Which Disney character do you feel sums you up to a ‘T’?
Oh dear, I have not thought about Disney characters for a very long time! I would say I am a little like Snow White who has a cheerful, trusting nature and motherly character. 

Q3: How did you and your hubby meet?
A group of people from our church would meet in the Addington Hospital Chapel before going off to visit patients who did not receive visitors. I remember the day Moresby walked into the small chapel and I thought, wow, what a nice looking guy! He had his hands in his pockets and a friendly smile on his face. 7 
months later we were married! Many family and friends thought that we were rushing but we knew that the Lord would be the foundation of our marriage. I was 23 and Moresby was 27.

Q4: Was your wedding everything you hoped it would be? Would you go back and change anything? Do you have any advice for brides-to-be?
Our wedding was wonderful. We got married on 21 December 1979. I don’t just mean the pretty things on the table or the flowers. Even after all these years, I have memories of holding my dad’s arm and how emotional he was as he walked me down the isle. The excitement and smile on Moresby’s face that I was about to become his wife. The pastor’s message. How we held hands as we said our vows to each other and to the Lord. And lastly as we turned to leave the church and saw everyone sharing in our joy! 

My advice to brides-to-be is to enjoy every moment of your wedding day because it all goes by so quickly! Ask family and friends to take lots of photos – often they capture special moments which the photographer doesn’t. 

Q5: Has ‘life after the dress’ been as you imagined it would be? 
To be honest, all I hoped for was our marriage to be a happy one. But we both realized that to be happy we would always have to consider each other. We decided that we would never make a decision no matter how small without consulting the other. We still do it to this day. As the years passed we bought a home, had children, lived on a tight budget so that I could be at home with the boys and then we went through the teenage years! All those experiences brought happiness and challenges to our marriage. Sometimes we reacted differently and had to find a way to work through the situations together. Or at times one was stronger than the other and visa versa. The greatest joy was having children. I could not imagine my life without them.

Now that 34 years has passed we don’t sweat about the small things like we used to, we now joke and laugh at each other – most times! We have come full circle – the boys have left home (sometime ago!) and we are on our own once again and 
loving it!! 

Q6: What have you learnt about yourself since being married?
I am still the same person with the same values and beliefs. Maturity and life experiences over the years has taught me to be a little calmer and to wait on the Lord for change. What makes it sweeter is that Moresby has been my anchor when I have been emotional (blame it on my Greek heritage!) and I felt like a little boat bopping up and down on the sea of life.

I still have my wedding dress so I pulled it out and ironed it to photograph it for all to see. It is still in good condition, as if it was made yesterday except I that I can no longer fit into it!

Q7: If you could describe your marriage in 3 words, what would they be?
happy, content, safe. 

Q8: Do you have any pearls of wisdom you would like to share with my readers about being married? Perhaps something some wise person once told you, or something you've learnt the hard way?
Oh yes! Chat about everything BEFORE you get married e.g. each others role in the marriage, finances etc. Ask advice and guidance from older couples who set a good example. Good marriages don’t just happen, it takes communication and hard work . Always appreciate your spouse’s good qualities. If you only focus on each others faults and weaknesses you will become discontented. I know it can be hard at times! Remember, love is not a feeling: it is an unconditional commitment. Trust and forgive because there will be many times when you will need forgiveness! And lastly, try your best to respect and talk kindly to each other. I admit it is not always easy but you will reap the rewards if you do. 

To my husband: Thank you for being honest and kind. A man who loves the Lord and a good example to our sons. On a lighter note: thank-you for helping me make our bed every day for the last 34 years!
Ephesians: 5:33 "However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband"

You can find Irene at the following places:
Blog LuLu-Yesteryear Redeemed
Facebook: Lulu Shop

If you enjoyed this post, I'd love to hear from you in the comments below! If you would like to be featured here in this series, please do drop me a message here, I'd love to hear from you.
x

{Life After The Dress}...interviews with brides after their big day

I haven't done many interviews here on the blog, but the few that I have done I have really enjoyed. Now, having been married for just over a year, I've been thinking about the weeks and months leading up to my wedding day. Did I imagine life would be like this? How much did I think being married would change our relationship? Has it been easy? Would all our issues disappear the moment we seal our futures with a kiss?

These were all questions I know I was asking myself before the big day, and so I thought it might be nice (and useful to those ladies out there who are about to get married) that I interview some women who are married and get their perspectives on married life. Being married has been one of the most wonderful adventures I have ever been on. There have been ups and downs, naturally, but it has been a fun-filled roller coaster of self discovery and joy.

I am wanting to interview a whole range of married woman here on my blog; young, old and newlyweds.

If you would like to feature here, I'd love to hear from you. Please do drop me a line here (or use the contact page above).

I look forward to hearing from you!

I hope you enjoy this new series, and if you have any questions, queries or ideas for what to include, I'd love to hear from you in the comments below.

I will be introducing you to the first lovely lady next week!